My kitchen is the color of Shrek's complexion.

I should have been in New York this weekend. I was supposed to go for work but the plans got changed. So I decided to use the time to take on a big task that has been on my to-do list for months.

When we bought our house several years ago, I immediately fulfilled a dream I had latched on to for a long time – I painted the living room purple and the kitchen green. I loved it until six months ago, when I concluded I hated it. After much research and examination of fabric swatches and color cards, I settled on a gorgeous olive green shade and a terra cotta stain for our concrete floors.

I made my way to Home Depot with my color card in hand and presented it to the friendly paint mix expert behind the counter. But then my secret “second personality” came out. You know which one. The one that second guesses your gut instinct and makes you go in the opposite direction at the worst moment ever?

When Mr. Mixer asked me to confirm my color choice, I blurted,

“You know what? Let’s go with this shade instead – Zen Garden. Three gallons please.”

Zen Garden was a whole neighborhood away from olive green. It reminds me of that green color corrector you put on your face under makeup to hide red blotches. Patrick says it remind shim of Shrek.

*Cringe*

I dipped into the first can wholeheartedly and painted our kitchen. Oh man, it was so hard, so many corners to glide around, it took me about five hours. My arms are sore and I fell off the step stool once. Then I covered the floors with the lovely terra cotta color. One *small* factor I didn’t consider when switching hues – the Zen Garden looks anything but meditative when paired with the terra cotta floors and our appliances. Patrick and the kids keep reassuring me that it looks great, but I know better. I can see in their eyes that they are just saying that to prevent me, them and the house from another day of paint smell hell.

I am so exhausted and unsatisfied right now. What a waste of time and energy. Patrick took me and the kids to Sonic for shakes to cheer me up. We sucked on our straws and DeAngelo and Patrick went to bed. I looked at my newfound mess and remembered that the Wal-Mart 20 minutes away is open 24 hours and they have a paint department! Please note time, SNL is on!

“I shall go there and buy my olive green and have this problem fixed by sunrise!”, I thought to myself.

I stood up from the couch and told Maya I was headed to Wal-Mart “for a quick errand”. She knows me too well – I was serious. And she wouldn’t let me go alone, which meant she would have to come with me. She jumped out of her chair and pushed me back on the couch. She fell to her little 11-year-old knees, clasped he rhands together and BEGGED me to please not go.

Muy loca I am, I know that. So I thought I’d get out this negative vibe over here in cyber space.

I’m not sure how to handle this tomorrow. I only scheduled one day to dedicate to this semi-gloss latex themed project, tomorrow is chalked full of other things that I can’t postpone. I may have to live with this for another length of time. Sheesh! If only I had been in New York this weekend, none of this would have happened. I’d probably be sipping on a Frozen Hot Chocolate at Serendipity 3 right about now. Sigh…

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