Every time I have a jacked-up day, it is always on a Wednesday.
I had another episode today. Actually two of them. I think it has to do with me doing my TV craft segment on Wednesdays. I’m wound tighter than a watch spring because I worry about having a cool project to share with the public (I’m a middle child, I NEED acceptance!). For that reason, half of my common sense senors are on the fritz by the time hump day comes around.
Ditzy Episode No. 1:Last weekend I found a really nice and crisp black blouse at the clothing store. I bought it because A. It shaved five pounds off my round frame and B. It also was on sale. I set it aside in a special place in my room so I could wear it for my next craft segment. This morning I woke up, looked at it, got giddy and decided to go all out and get dressed up for the day to come.
I showered and got dressed wearing everything except the blouse. I had on my heels, a black skirt and leopard print push-up full-figured bra. I did my hair, put my make up on, ate breakfast and brushed my teeth. I didn’t dare put my new blouse on in fear of getting it dirty. A bit later, I gathered all my things for my TV segment, slung my purse strap over my shoulder, powered my face and added one last bit of Loreal’s Ruby Red lip color. With all my goods in hand, I bent over to Patrick on the couch to give him some sugar before I left for my crafty adventure. He lovingly kissed me back and walked me through the laundry room to door that leads to the garage. I opened it, but before I could step off the ledge he stopped me.
“Hey sexy,” he said. “Are you going to put a shirt on before you go to work?”
I FORGOT TO PUT MY NEW BLOUSE ON! Thank God I have a husband because who knows how far I would have traveled in a bra that looks like an armour chest plate left over from Troy.
Ditzy Episode No. 2: I finished my craft segment, cool and smooth. I got in my car that had been parked in the outside lot in 110 degree heat. I picked up my employee badge from the cup rest in between the seats – and it was weird because there were all these long skinny white strings attached to it.
If I were a brainiac like say Oprah or geez, even Paris Hilton – I surely would have stopped right there to see what the heck it was. But it was Wednesday and I’m Kathy. I decided to multi-task and put on my badge while trying to solve the Case of the Skinny White Strings.
Only after I had the badge on did I look down to see a huge glob of melted gum that one of the kids had stuck in a little piece of cardboard after the movie last night. Instead of putting it in the trash like normal children would do, one of these stinkers stuck it in a folded piece of cardboard and disposed of it in the cup holder. Those white strings which were now running up and down my chest and around the back of my hair was ABC (already been chewed) gum! It was sticky and gross and I had a really hard time coaxing it off my clothes and hair.
It must be karma for making them sit through the Scottish drama last night!
See more crafty ideas in The Crafty Chica Project Library! All content/photos copyright, © Kathy Cano-Murillo, 2008.